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GENJI BANZAI
Things Hizamaru Has Shown His Anija After Learning (Upset Edition):
- the boutique clothes
- bubble bath
- aquarium
- the sunset and stars by the pool
- the fucking ahegao gun makes human noises but doesn't have a human form??? ANIJA?
- the arcade bc it's cool
- what chocobos and spiracorns look like from a book in the library from prompto's world
- the fucking heelys
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hige actually looks neatly rested. he's still stretching idly as he wanders out - and he's trying not to laugh as he looks hizamaru over. he's actually going to reach out and adjust the yukata so that his brother is covered better because it's 8 fucking am, you slut.]
You look like you had fun.
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Embarrassed once he glances down, he reaches up to help Higekiri get the other arm of the yukata over his shoulder and stuff. He actually flushes about it.]
It wasn't... a date, I think. [His definition of date is different??] Zero-san just wanted to have sex.
[ha ha!!
Anyway, he leans up to join Higekiri side by side.]
Were you okay with Tamamo-san?
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[he doesn't want his little brother to be sad about it
but also at the mention of tamamo he just hums softly]
Yes, we were fine. It's always fun with her - but I think she may want me to love her.
[how did hige actually have the romantic evening when hiza was the one asked on a date]
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Mm. Prompto-san said a date is a [(prompto voice)] "romantic outing with someone you like." It's someone you find special. You want to hold their hand and kiss them. [He looks thoughtful, like he's recalling.] You get warm and "get butterflies" inside? You forget how to talk or act silly around them.
[So unfortunately, very casually:]
Yes, let's go on a date, elder brother. I'd like that. [A brotherly genji date, it's fine. He glances at Higekiri.] Do you want to love her, elder brother...? [He seems... not jealous, but perhaps a bit worried?]
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[it's said like someone who still doesn't quite understand it - though he at least finds it rather endearing. he laughs then, and automatically reaches for hizamaru's hand before leaning over to press a kiss to his cheek. there, that's part of the date, right]
Then we'll do that.
[horrible. absolutely terrible. they'll continue on their walk and even as the elevator moves to bring them down the floors, he's thoughtful]
Oh... I told her I'd try - because I'd like to see her happy. Nikori told me it's more of that 'warm' feeling... but we are blades, you know? Perhaps it is something new to feel in this body... so it is not impossible.
But the only one that I know I love very much is you.
[and then he'll move to walk out of the elevator, dropping that statement so very casually, because it looks like he's forgotten that he never told hizamaru that before. but loving him is something that's so natural that higekiri doesn't even acknowledge it as a foreign feeling.]
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[But he doesn't say what else he would maybe like to say--about feeling something very much like that frequently when he's with Higekiri. It's actually... not the same branch of love. Or, rather, it is, it's very much love at its purest form, but it's apparently something family is more akin to experiencing than lovers. Perhaps.
When Higekiri takes his hand, he lets it happen, lacing their fingers. The kiss makes him flush again. Hm. Warm feeling... Someone you love... Makes you get butterflies... He never understood how this was supposed to be any different? How did Prompto know the difference between friends and family and this? It feels just like described.]
I--
[He looks up very suddenly, very shocked. It feels as if... his heart has stopped? Higekiri continues forward, and he stumbles when he follows after until he catches himself on the other side of the elevator doors. He halts, and Higekiri's arm jerks when he doesn't budge. He's still staring.
His eyes sting, watery, and there's a different sort of heat to his face.] E-Elder brother... [He just stands there in the damn hallway and cries holding Higekiri's hand.]
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what he feels for hizamaru is different - or so he thinks. it is not a love that is born from fluttering feelings, or from clumsy statements. it is a love that is engraved into his blade, that stems from the very steel that binds them both. it is a love that tells him that to protect his brother is to protect himself, and that to care for him is one of the few things in higekiri's long life that's worth remembering.
so he pauses when he cannot pull hizamaru any further, glancing over his shoulder and blinking in surprise.]
Eh... Did I say something wrong again?
[he turns and steps closer to hizamaru, hand raising to try to brush away his tears from his cheeks. how is it that hizamaru always manages to feel so much more than he does?]
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I... just... [He swallows against the hoarse of his voice.] I'm so-sorry, elder brother. [For being a crying mess out of nowhere right at the start of their "date."] I just feel...
...so happy.
[He doesn't want Higekiri to look at his face like this, so he throws his arms up and wraps them around Higekiri's shoulders, squeezing himself close and burying his face in the crook of Higekiri's neck. His voice is wobbly and muffled, but he talks anyway, soft where Higekiri can hear:]
My chest is going to burst... I'm so happy... that you love me, elder brother.
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higekiri blinks at that, momentarily surprised even as hizamaru throws himself against him. he catches his brother easily, arms wrapping around his waist to hold him close, and he wonders what kind of injuries he must be sustaining to feel this way. he tilts his head in confusion, even as he lets hizamaru cry, rubbing his back in what he hopes is a soothing gesture.]
... of course I do.
[there is no sense of dramatics to higekiri's confession - mostly because he didn't think it was supposed to be surprising.]
Eh... Did I really forget to mention all this time...?
[apparently!!! but he'll just laugh softly anyway, before letting his head rest against hizamaru's, fond and amused]
Of course I love you. More than anyone, or anything.
[debatable literally only because the genji exist - but in this space, in this timeline, he knows without a doubt that there is no one that means more to him than hizamaru.]
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I love you as well.
[He had felt some things with others, strange and wild things he didn't know this body could feel. But nothing so much as seeing his brother's sadness over Dimitri, his brother's anger when he had been ill, the worry, or hearing the words Higekiri didn't think were ever needed.
He draws back in an attempt to straighten up, to pull everything back in and stand more professional. He wipes the tears from his face with the back of his hand and wrist.]
Elder brother...
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Mm, I know.
[wasn't it a given? when they possessed only each other for attachment, for company, along with their masters, how could there be anything there except love?
when hizamaru straightens up, higekiri will assist, his hand coming up to his cheek as his thumb brushes away tears on one side - for the other he'll lean in to try to kiss the tear tracks away, as if that'll be enough to soothe his brother's volatile emotions. when he offers a smile, it's soft and fond]
I'll always love you. So do not forget.
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I'll never forget, elder brother.
[He leans back and once more wipes his face to make sure every evidence is gone that he had been a big baby. Wheeeew. He reels himself back in to be the dutiful, put-together little brother!]
Sorry. Let's have breakfast. [He reaches to take Higekiri by the hand. He'll lead them!] The eating room or...?
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Mm - that's fine. We can eat whatever is already served.
But you needn't apologize. That was rather endearing.
[HIGE SAID THE L WORD AND HIZA JUST FUCKIN BAWLED]