Exactly. I've died so many times and I still don't want to ever again. [He's not afraid, necessarily, but he sort of refuses to let things end.]
Don't apologize. Like I said, you did everything you could, but this enemy's different than anything all of us have faced. That's why we're stuck. [But he frowns.] It's going to keep coming after us, but we have to be ready to fight back in the way we know how until we get better. And that's in trial and exorcising demons as they're caught.
We will. [He's confident of that much, now knowing that they're out there somewhere. Of course, he kind of forgot he never exactly told Hizamaru what kind of a person he is, so he blinks in surprise at the question.]
I...[Hm.] Your missions involve traveling to different points in history, right?
Okay. So when that happens, it's all a part of the same timeline. History is one linear line and you can't change things too differently or you'll risk changing history forever. Your job is to make sure things stay the same.
[Or that's how he understands.] ...where I'm from, some of us have the ability to jump to different timelines. It's an ability called SHIFTing, which means that we can move to other versions of history and take the place of other versions of ourselves. Because of who we are, we have access to all of our old memories and the memories from other timelines we've lived in. But the only way to SHIFT is to be in immediate danger...like dying.
We found out the hard way, but we learned to SHIFT to save ourselves from the timelines where we died. That's what Carlos and I were working on before we came here. Getting to the timeline where all of us were alive.
[Surprisingly, he seems to get the gist of this despite never hearing anything like it. Time travel on his end helps. Though his lips thin, he wonders if this is toeing the line of changing history.
Does jumping around the timeline and continuing on that path... mean changing history? But they're all different. Different outcomes. Well, it's the same outcome--death--but getting there changes.]
Junpei-san... You...
[He shakes his head, feeling sad and... confused.] But if you were supposed to die... [No. That's ugly to say, he thinks. Junpei wants to live? Junpei is alive right now. But history...]
[...it doesn't take a genius to understand what Hizamaru's implying, and this time he's the one who frowns.]
We weren't supposed to. The Decision Game was a trap set up for us to figure out how to make sure history went the way it was supposed to. Secure somebody's existence. Set things into motion. Whatever. [He's pissed, frankly, but that's neither here nor there.] It was to force our hand and make sure things went a certain way, but we all died multiple times getting there. We were told at least six of us had to die, but that wasn't true. We could, and did, find a way to get out with everyone surviving.
And I can't die now when there are still things we have to fix and someone I have to get back to. [A pause.] The fate of humanity depends on us.
[The tension in his shoulders dissipates some, and they relax. It puts his mind more at ease knowing Junpei wasn't willy-nilly flying through space-time with the human notion of desperately changing history.]
You'll be okay, Junpei-san. We won't let anything happen to you. [Easier said than done; he learned this the hard way.] Do you think... that's what's happening here?
We are supposed to find the timeline when we all are alive?
[He can't guarantee that nothing will happen to him, but he manages a small smile anyway. Best to keep that thought to himself. Still, it's a question that's been on his mind, too.]
I've wondered that myself. This place was set up to learn from the mistakes of the group before us, so...maybe there's something we're supposed to figure out. I can't SHIFT here and Carlos couldn't either. You guys can't go on missions without orders from your saniwa, who also isn't here.
But that doesn't mean those skills won't be used later. Especially if we now know that those who die are still accessible somehow.
I wonder why... they are waiting. Prompto-san, and Carlos-san, and Polly-san. If they are on another side... They aren't returned home, almost as if we don't have a reason to die. We're meant to stay alive, but...
What's our mission? Is it really to get rid of the demon Polly-san released? It's happened before...?
[Oh. Uh oh. He's not sure what's going through Hizamaru's head, but there's a nod anyway.]
Of course. Most of what we talk about stays between you and me anyway unless I tell you otherwise. [He has to wonder what this means though.] What kind of secret orders...?
Before we came here, elder brother and I were sorted into a unit with Mikazuki-sama, Kogitsunemaru-sama, Iwatooshi-san, and Imanotsurugi-san. We traveled back to the Heian period, to protect the history of our former masters... Yoshitsune-sama and Yoritomo-sama.
But before we were deployed... [He glances at Junpei.] Our master called elder brother and I to him, and he asked us to keep an eye on Mikazuki-sama. He believed... Mikazuki-sama would try to tamper with the course of history.
Mikazuki-sama did... a little. And I wonder... if that is happening here, too.
[So it's happened in other universes, too. That makes enough sense to him and he takes this information very seriously.]
I think that might be happening here, too, Hizamaru. [It's an unfortunate truth.] I've been thinking from the moment we woke up that someone was here tampering with things, but I don't have any proof. [He tilts his head.]
Why did your master think Mikazuki would change things?
He is very wise. Mikazuki-sama... may not have meant any harm. He has a disposition like my elder brother. It is similar. He is carefree and laughs, but... He is like the moon, is what I think elder brother was trying to tell me.
You see one side, lit up, but there is still another side to the moon we do not see. The hidden side. Mikazuki-sama is like that. Elder brother, too, at times.
The dark side of the moon. [It makes sense, sure, but...] Hard to know what a person's real motivations are when they keep their true thoughts hidden, isn't it? Was that normal for him? To hide things.
I’m not sure, as I have only recently met him, but... I believe so, yes. If he is like elder brother... Yes, there are parts of them hidden from others. Though it’s difficult to know what the parts are about.
Most humans are that way, too. It's tricky to really know if you ever truly know a person...some people...will create entire facades to hide who they are. And when you learn, you discover you didn't know a thing about someone you may have been close to.
[He's quiet for a bit while he thinks about how to answer the question, and then, of course, he shakes his head.]
It worries me. Sometimes, it's difficult to tell what elder brother is really thinking. He will say things I don't quite understand until later, or... not at all. But I trust him. He really is amazing.
Even if there's a side of him I don't know, I trust it's honorable.
Mikazuki-sama... I can't say. I think, perhaps, there is a good reason for doing what he does. [He frowns.] If that is the case here... it will make things more difficult. If someone believes they are doing the right thing, but what they're doing seems wrong.
[...there's a nod, and part of him wants to say you can't trust people so blindly even when you love them that much, but it wouldn't do any good to have him hear that. Nobody needs Junpei's fucked up philosophy on trust, so he keeps it to himself.]
I think it's entirely possible for someone to be a good person and still do bad things because it seems like the best course of action. [...] Hizamaru. Can you keep another secret from your brother for me? I'll tell him when the time is right, but I don't want too many people knowing in case I'm wrong.
[His face grows serious, but not judgmental. He nods his head, reaching up to place his hand by his chest over his heart.]
I promise it will be a secret kept between us, Junpei-san. [He's more relieved by the "I'll tell him when the time is right," so Junpei knew exactly where to sock him.] I won't tell anyone.
[Sometimes you gently manipulate a puppysword, but it's true. He'll tell Higekiri later when he feels that he can. For now, he's debating how to frame what his next thought is.]
...I've been thinking about this for a while now. How there are people here among us who know more than what they're saying. But I think there may be people who have been told to do something different in this game that may or may not be good for us. If that's true, I'd like to find those people to make sure they won't ruin what we're working toward. I...don't really have proof yet outside of what's happened before, but that's enough reason I want to check myself.
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Don't apologize. Like I said, you did everything you could, but this enemy's different than anything all of us have faced. That's why we're stuck. [But he frowns.] It's going to keep coming after us, but we have to be ready to fight back in the way we know how until we get better. And that's in trial and exorcising demons as they're caught.
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[His brows pull together again. He glances away, and then he looks at Junpei, somewhat bewildered.]
What did you mean by, "I've died so many times," Junpei-san?
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I...[Hm.] Your missions involve traveling to different points in history, right?
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[He tilts his head.]
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[Or that's how he understands.] ...where I'm from, some of us have the ability to jump to different timelines. It's an ability called SHIFTing, which means that we can move to other versions of history and take the place of other versions of ourselves. Because of who we are, we have access to all of our old memories and the memories from other timelines we've lived in. But the only way to SHIFT is to be in immediate danger...like dying.
We found out the hard way, but we learned to SHIFT to save ourselves from the timelines where we died. That's what Carlos and I were working on before we came here. Getting to the timeline where all of us were alive.
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Does jumping around the timeline and continuing on that path... mean changing history? But they're all different. Different outcomes. Well, it's the same outcome--death--but getting there changes.]
Junpei-san... You...
[He shakes his head, feeling sad and... confused.] But if you were supposed to die... [No. That's ugly to say, he thinks. Junpei wants to live? Junpei is alive right now. But history...]
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We weren't supposed to. The Decision Game was a trap set up for us to figure out how to make sure history went the way it was supposed to. Secure somebody's existence. Set things into motion. Whatever. [He's pissed, frankly, but that's neither here nor there.] It was to force our hand and make sure things went a certain way, but we all died multiple times getting there. We were told at least six of us had to die, but that wasn't true. We could, and did, find a way to get out with everyone surviving.
And I can't die now when there are still things we have to fix and someone I have to get back to. [A pause.] The fate of humanity depends on us.
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You'll be okay, Junpei-san. We won't let anything happen to you. [Easier said than done; he learned this the hard way.] Do you think... that's what's happening here?
We are supposed to find the timeline when we all are alive?
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I've wondered that myself. This place was set up to learn from the mistakes of the group before us, so...maybe there's something we're supposed to figure out. I can't SHIFT here and Carlos couldn't either. You guys can't go on missions without orders from your saniwa, who also isn't here.
But that doesn't mean those skills won't be used later. Especially if we now know that those who die are still accessible somehow.
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What's our mission? Is it really to get rid of the demon Polly-san released? It's happened before...?
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Our mission right now, I think, is to learn more about what our mission is. Sounds counterproductive doesn't it?
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[There's a pause. He looks away, brows creased. Something doesn't look settled right with him.]
Junpei-san, if I tell you something, will you promise not to tell anyone? They are... secret orders from our master.
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Of course. Most of what we talk about stays between you and me anyway unless I tell you otherwise. [He has to wonder what this means though.] What kind of secret orders...?
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But before we were deployed... [He glances at Junpei.] Our master called elder brother and I to him, and he asked us to keep an eye on Mikazuki-sama. He believed... Mikazuki-sama would try to tamper with the course of history.
Mikazuki-sama did... a little. And I wonder... if that is happening here, too.
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I think that might be happening here, too, Hizamaru. [It's an unfortunate truth.] I've been thinking from the moment we woke up that someone was here tampering with things, but I don't have any proof. [He tilts his head.]
Why did your master think Mikazuki would change things?
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He is very wise. Mikazuki-sama... may not have meant any harm. He has a disposition like my elder brother. It is similar. He is carefree and laughs, but... He is like the moon, is what I think elder brother was trying to tell me.
You see one side, lit up, but there is still another side to the moon we do not see. The hidden side. Mikazuki-sama is like that. Elder brother, too, at times.
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[...hm.] Does it bother you? To not know.
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It worries me. Sometimes, it's difficult to tell what elder brother is really thinking. He will say things I don't quite understand until later, or... not at all. But I trust him. He really is amazing.
Even if there's a side of him I don't know, I trust it's honorable.
Mikazuki-sama... I can't say. I think, perhaps, there is a good reason for doing what he does. [He frowns.] If that is the case here... it will make things more difficult. If someone believes they are doing the right thing, but what they're doing seems wrong.
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I think it's entirely possible for someone to be a good person and still do bad things because it seems like the best course of action. [...] Hizamaru. Can you keep another secret from your brother for me? I'll tell him when the time is right, but I don't want too many people knowing in case I'm wrong.
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I promise it will be a secret kept between us, Junpei-san. [He's more relieved by the "I'll tell him when the time is right," so Junpei knew exactly where to sock him.] I won't tell anyone.
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...I've been thinking about this for a while now. How there are people here among us who know more than what they're saying. But I think there may be people who have been told to do something different in this game that may or may not be good for us. If that's true, I'd like to find those people to make sure they won't ruin what we're working toward. I...don't really have proof yet outside of what's happened before, but that's enough reason I want to check myself.